Keeping the Faith
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IMDB rating: 6.60 Plot: A love triangle between three friends. Rabbi Jake Schram and Father Brian Finn, two friends, are out to update their religions and draw in more worshipers. With the arrival of Anna Reilly, an old childhood friend of the two, the men’s lives are thrown a curve ball. Anna has become a stunning beauty with a lot of spunk and ambition, and both of them want her. A major road block to Anna for both men is their religion. Jake is up for a head position at his synagogue and taking on a non-Jewish partner is frowned upon, besides the fact that his mother disowned his brother for marrying a non-Jewish woman. Brian has given a vow of celibacy to become a priest. |
Actors: Stiller Ben,Norton Edward,Wallach Eli,Rifkin Ron,Forman Milos,Leung Ken,George Brian,Blumberg Stuart,Comedy,Drama,Romance,
Girlfriend left, found someone else, says she'll be with me again. What to do?
Part one, my relationship with her: She asked me out in our second semester of Senior high school year and, after much deliberation, I agreed (my first gf). I found her to be a wonderful person, and she confessed that she loved me a few days into the relationship. I told her I loved her back, which was not true at the time. We had a relationship that became more and more intense and stormy as time went on. I got jealous and mean, asking her to change things I didn’t like. She tried, but could not maintain these changes. The changes I asked I thought were simple: don’t do drugs, don’t be delinquent, don’t hang out with certain sketchy people. Most of all, I questioned her love for me. It was so quick a confession, and we moved forward so fast it didn’t seem real or right.
Part two, my long-distance relationship with her: Come fall, I was off to college 2000 miles away from her. I got worse. I was more jealous by the day because I wasn’t with her. I explained that my jealousy was founded because she had dated before and she was my first everything. This continued for the fall and spring semesters of my freshman and sophomore years. We saw each other during the summer and winter breaks, but during those times, while I was nicer to her, I had my jerk moments. Let’s just say I’ve hurt her in more than one way. I’ve regulated who she could and could not see, then took it back, then imposed regulations again, then took that back, etc. I even broke up with her, stating that it was temporary (and never really meaning it, but she didn’t know that) and getting back together with her a few times. She claimed she wanted to commit suicide at one point, that she had let no one affect her the way I had, that she cares about me so much that she values everything I say, bad or good. I made her life hell because she did so many things to make mine more stressful than it already was, but she stuck with me and I stuck with her.
Part three, the break-up: Fall semester of my junior year in college, we haven’t spoken very often, as we don’t speak very often when I’m away, and she tells me that some guy, John, has confessed his feelings to her. She called me to see if I would say similarly nice things to her and, I speculate, make her feel better about having me. Of course, I get jealous instantly. I get mad and we break up with each other. I later ask for her back, but she says she needs to not be with anyone and clear her head. I say I don’t like it, but that I understand and would like to be with her again in the winter. This was in October.
Part four, after the break-up: She ends up falling for John because he is nice, respectful, interesting, and there for her. I understand why, psychologically, she has done this. But it seems such a typical thing to do for someone who has proved herself to be atypical. I am enraged, but I tell her that I want to win her back. I essentially begin to try to woo her over the phone, but I know she’s falling further and further for this guy, as she informs me that they kiss and do other intimate things. She says they are not together. I tell her that when I get back things are going to be different. She says she’ll see.
Part five, winter break: I am back in town and we meet up. John is going home for the winter, 2000 miles away, which I found ironic. I get angry and jealous the first and second times we meet, she gets angry back. We both apologize to each other and our subsequent encounters are much more enjoyable. After a particularly nice time, she declares to me that she wants to be John’s girlfriend. I am, of course, incredulous and pissed. But I take it in stride and am just hurt. And I stay hurt the entire winter break, still taking her out to places, hanging out with her, and talking on the phone a lot. It was almost like we were never apart but for the occasional awkwardness. Soon, however, that disappeared as well, as we kissed again, then touched each other again, then made love again. These things were what one normally counts as cheating, but she did not. She said it was "keeping a promise to me." She had promised me one last kiss and one last time. It was more than one of each and she told me "I love you" again and again. After a while she called it "keeping faith to two different people in two different ways." That is BS. She said that she only wanted to be with John for the spring semester and that she would be with me again once it was over.
Part six, present day: I’m hurting and going crazy. I ask what they do together, and she tells me, and it hurts. I keep on asking. I still get mad because I’m jealous. She still tells me she loves me. I know I love her. I talk to her often. I tell her how much I love, appreciate, and like her.
Part seven, the question: Should I get back together with her at the end of the semester, as she proposed to do?I love her. I don’t think I can be with anyone else.
part eight: kill yourself you’re a piece of shit.
John | Feb 09, 2010
You have issues, immense issues, with control and jealousy, and she is probably better off without you in her life, treating her as though she is your personal possession, and as if she is there to obey you and cater to your jealous whims, and abusive desires. (In case you were not aware, you WERE an abusive partner in this relationship. Controlling someone as if they are something you OWN is abusive behavior).
What she is experiencing, in my opinion, is Stolkholm Syndrome. Look it up if you don’t know what it is. Basically, she doesn’t love you.
She probably loves the guy that she is with, and if you were, in any way, a rational human being, you would know this, you would acknowledge this, and stay away from her. Instead, you are selfish, running on jealousy and rage- fueled emotions, thinking only for yourself and how all of this impacts YOU.
You need to stop talking to her and let her be happy.
Let me tell you something- you NEED to seek therapy, and you need to learn how to be a big boy and to handle a relationship like an adult, and there is no reason why you should be seeking any type of serious relationship ESPECIALLY a long- distance one, until you get help to manage your abusive behavior, and to get rid of those tendencies that you have to act more like a captor than a partner. You are not emotionally mature enough, or stable enough, to enter into a serious relationship.
YES LET HER GO. Let her be happy with someone who isn’t controlling, obsessive and jealous. Don’t think you can be with anyone else? Good! You shouldn’t be with anyone else until you can handle it like a grown up instead of a toddler who only knows "me me me".
holymell | Feb 09, 2010
Dude… first off: that sounds rough. i went through something like that except the whole long distance thing. Went out with her for 3 and a half years, then she broke up with me saying we wanted different things. tryed for a month to get back with her with no luck. 3 months go by without us talking. then she calls crying saying she wants to get back together cuz she still loves me and that she would break up with her current boyfriend. meet for lunch. go for a movie. everything seems fine. then after a couple weeks she says she doesnt love me as much and doesnt know how to break up with her boyfriend and that we cant be together anymore. all in this time i still love her and cannot stop thinking about her. so long story short… what she says and ends up doing could be 2 complete opposites and you can end up heart broken again… and twice by the same person sucks.. believe me…
Daniel L | Feb 09, 2010
First off you can be with someone else! she maybe hard to find but shes out there. I too, have had an experience like this and let me tell ya it sounds like shes playing some pretty mean games with your head. Even though wat you did to her wasn’t very nice either. But if all this is going on now its a very hard thing to salvage, and both of y’all would have to change some very serious aspects of your relationship. U have to ask yourself seriously if you can get around jealousy of her being with this other guy? Which in my experience it was absolutely impossible.With all that said i don’t feel that its a good idea to get back with her, You got your whole life ahead of you to find the one that truly makes you happy. I know its easier said than done,but you should find someone new. But be more "selective" in what you are looking for this time. You will find much more happiness with someone that really compliments you, and like wise. so that’s how i feel about the situation, wish you the best of luck and i hope things work out for you
Thomas | Feb 09, 2010
All those guys are handsome as hell and their bodies I absolutely lust after lol.
| Dec 24, 2009
